Thoughts Articles

One of the most popular topics that people come to me about is relationships. After all, the quality of our lives is very much determined by the quality of the relationships we have with ourselves and others. I will start this by saying exactly what I do in my private sessions. You can not change anyone else. It’s important to acknowledge what is in your control and what is not. Ultimately, you can not force change within your loved one, you can however do your own work and come from a place of understanding, compassion, and assertion. We will get on to that in a moment.

So let’s talk about what a healthy relationship is. I have popped a list below however consider whether you have any additions to make.

Black Moon Lilith placement.
Black Moon Lilith is a point in the sky in which the moon is farthest from the earth.
A story of Lilith because you know I’m a nerd for these things.
In some Jewish mythology/folklore, Lilith is told to be Adams’s first wife before Eve. Rather than being created from his rib as Eve, she was created with the same clay as Adam. In the stories, she refuses to be subservient to Adam stating that they are equals, and leaves the Garden of Eden. She was portrayed as a demoness and the story goes that the angels killed hundreds of her children a day for her disobedience. There has been a turnaround on the view of Lilith as being the original woman to fight for equality.

So many fears around this topic.
Fearful of appearing weak.
Fearful of being hurt.
Fearful of being taken advantage of.
Fearful of rejection.
Fearful abandonment.
Fearful of judgment.

Your shadow is the parts of our personality that you don’t see or don’t want to see.
It is all the parts of yourself that you repressed in childhood. All of the parts of you that you think to be unlovable, unlikeable, unacceptable. Parts of us that we learn to hide because through lived experience we believe we have to. To belong, to survive.